Being married to a German

Being married with a German, by Packing my Suitcase.

Life is full of surprises! If 10 years ago someone had told me that I would be married to a German, I would laugh. What? With a German? A husband who actually speaks that crazy language that sounds more like cursing, drinks lots of beer and only eats potatoes and sausages?

Well, life is REALLY full of surprises, not only I married a German who speaks German, but one that also speaks my language too, Portuguese. Can this get any better? Yes, our 3-year wedding anniversary is tomorrow, and while this post is being published, we are celebrating this day in Paris.

Since tomorrow is a special day for W and me, I figured it would be a great idea to share with you what it’s like to be married to a German. No, it’s not only about beer, potatoes and sausages…. hmm, yes, just a little bit, but there is more to it. Care to keep reading?

Being married with a German, by Packing my Suitcase.

One of the first things I learned about a German man is that he can cry. I mean, a lot, of happiness and sadness, and they aren’t ashamed of that. So forget what you’ve heard about all the Germans being cold and mean. They have a heart, they can love deeply and intense, they are loyal and they do everything they possibly can to make their loved ones happy.

Yes, the language sucks. I am lucky, I get to have arguments with W in my own language, sort of, because sometimes he doesn’t know the Portuguese word for what he wants to say, or I don’t remember the Portuguese word at the moment and just say it in German. Yes, it’s confusing. We have our own language, a crazy mix of German, Portuguese and English, but what matters is that we always find a way to understand the other.

Not all Germans are alcoholics, but probably the vast majority is workaholic. They are very dedicated at work, and approximately 90% – I estimated that – of what they talk about after work is work. Discussing relationship? Good luck with that… because for them, most of the time everything is fine. The rest 10% of remaining subjects of conversation involve football, cars, and maybe something they need to fix in the house.

Being married with a German, by Packing my Suitcase.

Oh yes, there is this detail that sooner or later you will learn after being married with a German: they are addicted to fixing things in the house, and their favourite store in town is a Baumarkt – the DIY store. Broken sink? Shower? Window? Couch? Why call a professional if you already have your German husband?

Fixing things at home is just one of their domestic capabilities, they also cook and clean, help with the kids, iron their clothes, walk the dog, and they even kill spiders in case you need. However, they don’t really know where dirty clothes should go, and they will complain every time you forget to open the window for at least 5 minutes during winter!

Don’t worry, to make him forgive you for not opening the window you can accept to have potatoes for dinner as a side dish once again. Or maybe a Schweinbraten with Knodel? I am sure he won’t complain, and will even think that you are finally showing the German in you that he knew it was there all along.

Now, to the beer part. Yes, they love beer, but who didn’t know that? What probably many of you don’t know is that they drink it almost every day, sometimes even for breakfast – here in Bavaria. At first you will think they will become alcoholics sometime soon, but then you will realize that what will happen is a growth on their bellies. Anyways, you might also get home, open your fridge to grab something to drink, and this is what you will find…

Being married with a German, by Packing my Suitcase.

To match the beer… Bundesliga – the German football national championship – every weekend for 10 months throughout the year, enough to make your football vocabulary impeccable. Get used to it, instead of complaining join him and wear his team’s t-shirt… he will love you forever because of that. Go Bayern!

If you still don’t know why there are so many German Formula 1 drivers, wait until you are with your German husband on the Autobahn. These men grow up racing, speeding to over 200km/h like it is 80km, and complaining whenever someone is at 140km/h in front of them. No wonder they build the best cars in the world.

Oh, and besides driving they are also crazy about technology. Tablets, phones, laptops? That’s just the beginning. At home, they have a machine for everything: from robots that clean the house to electric toothbrushes. Why all the work if a machine can do most of it for you?

Being married with a German, by Packing my Suitcase.

I almost forgot! Be used to the fact that probably every week you will get packages on the mail. Even if you think you didn’t order anything, someone else in your house did, and it was probably your German husband.

Funny aspects aside, my German husband, also my favourite travel companion, was the key to my integration in Germany. He changed me for the better, he believes and supports me in every step of the way, and he manages to put a smile on my face every single day for the past 5 years. And for that… I am grateful for being married with a German like you W.

Ich liebe dich.

Being married with a German, by Packing my Suitcase.


*The photos on this post are from my personal archives: taken on my wedding day.

*Not everything mentioned in this post can be applied to all Germans, this was based on my personal experience.

About Allane

A Brazilian living in Germany. Married to W. mommy to a baby girl and a Golden Retriever. Traveler, writer, aspiring photographer, diver, wine appreciator, Formula 1 fan, avid reader of historical and young adult fictions books. City girl, nature lover, believer of a better world, one little change at a time.

  • hahahaha really? What a nice story πŸ˜€
    We have a similar situation then, with and our Germans! It’s so nice to know that other people have similar stories πŸ˜€

  • hahaha thank you so much Susi!!
    I’m happy to know you agree with what I said!
    I know that not everyone is like this, but I guess many a very similar πŸ˜€

  • Thank you so much Lucy! It’s really nice of you πŸ˜€
    You are right, there are a lot of stereotypes out there, about the Germans and many other nationalities. Of course not everyone is the same, I know Germans that are very different from my husband, but I have noticies that the vast majority I know or hear about from friends are more or less like this πŸ˜€

  • Thank you so much dear!!! πŸ˜€ We had an amazing time in Paris, though veeeeery hot hahaha

    Yes, the Germans also have beer for breakfast, but it’s not so often. Once in a while they have a Weißbier with white sausages, especially here in Bavaria πŸ˜€

    I knoooow, they are crazy with deadlines hahahaha

  • hahahaa awnnn! Thank you so much for sharing your story, I appreciate it. I enjoy knowing love stories from other people around the world πŸ˜€ I wish you both lots of love and happiness!

  • Thank you so much dear!! πŸ˜€
    hahaha I can imagine!! I guess marrying someone from a different country always has its quirks right? I like that, it’s a constant process of learning with each other πŸ˜€

  • Thank you so much dear <3
    Ohhh that's interesting that you had a German boyfriend, cool!! πŸ˜€
    Thank you, happy that you liked the dress… the part that you saw… if you want I can send you some pictures, or we can add each other on FB, I have some photos of the wedding on my page πŸ˜€

  • ahahahaha thank you so much Shikha!!
    I’m glad I made you laugh πŸ˜€ <3
    Thank you for your kind words, and what a coincidence about our weddings πŸ˜€ we one more thing in common hahaha

  • Hi Timo!! Thank you for your comment!
    Probably my husband is too Bavarian hahaha and I know that not every German is like that πŸ˜€
    I also don’t like KnΓΆdel hahaha
    The beer for breakfast is what they call a Bavarian breakfast around here… with white sausages and brezen πŸ˜€

  • Gin

    Aww this is actually so sweet to read all about it ! Happy anniversary ! I’m sorry, I’m so beyond reading blog posts.. I hope you had fun in Paris !

    • Thank you soooo much dear <3
      hahaha don't worry! I am so overload these last days that I need to catch up with many blog posts too πŸ˜€

  • Thank you sooo much dear <3

  • Thank you so much dear Rosemary πŸ˜€

  • Thank you so much dear πŸ˜€
    Yesss, it was a photoshoot to celebrate our anniversary!! Happy that you liked it πŸ˜€

  • Mabel Kwong

    What a beautiful post about being married to a German and W. He must be very touched, and very lucky to have you as a partner <3 A bit late, but Happy Anniversary and many more to come! Haha, sounds like W is good with his hands. I won't be surprised if he builds a house for the two of you one day πŸ˜€

    • Thank you sooo much Mabel πŸ˜€
      I think we are both lucky to have each other, we are a great team together with Enzzo hahaha πŸ˜€
      Yess, in fact, Germans love to build houses too!!

  • Awnnn thank you so much dear <3 I appreciate it!
    Yes, you are right, it's no doubt a different experience , and we are constantly learning with each other. πŸ˜€

  • hahaha thank you so much Taykure! Cool that you found my blog and happy that I made you laugh πŸ˜€
    I speak German already, but I have the feeling it will never be 100%, the die dier dar will always be a problem hahaha πŸ˜€

  • Aww, Happy Anniversary! Yeah, my German isnt very good at dealing w feelings bc he has so many of them :)))))

  • hahaha thank you πŸ˜€

  • hahaha thank you Anna!! I also love reading and learning about this relationship difference! I have heard great stories πŸ˜€
    So interesting about your bf!! I think there are probably many cases like this!

  • Awnnn thank you Jing πŸ˜€
    Glad you found my blog again hahaa!!

  • Thank you so much dear!! Well, congratulations on your wedding, I hope you will be as happy as I am πŸ˜€

  • hahaha happy to know that you liked the post Grace, and that you enjoy my blog πŸ˜€
    Well good for you, this doesn’t happen often, he must trust you!
    Good luck with you everything πŸ˜‰

  • hahaha
    I’ve asked him to write a post about being married to a Brazilian.. let’s see when he will write it! πŸ˜€

  • Yoyo M

    I wonder if you have the detailed love story about how you met your husband! Would love to know!!

    • hahaha I do, but don’t plan on sharing on the blog though πŸ˜€ kind of too personal to share online.

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